Misconceptions
of Marriage

By Sita-pati das

Posted Mar. 31, 2005

Marriage does not condone or approve of sexual activity. It is the product of a civilization that recognizes that sexual activity increases material identification, and actively seeks to counteract this with regulative legislation.

So where does this philosophical deviation that marriage condones a lifestyle based around sex life come from? It's an age-old problem, as old as human civilization itself. It's not conservative versus liberal. It's progressive versus reactionary.

The reactionaries want to hold on to their current state of consciousness, so they are always looking for something in the guidelines for progress that justifies their current situation. The progressives, on the other hand, are busy looking for ways to take advantage of those same guidelines to advance.

Unfortunately the human being has the tendency to cheat, so the reactionary element is strong in human society. This is described in the Srimad Bhagavatam, one of the greatest works on spiritually progressive life.

The compiler of the original Vedic canon, Srila Vyasadeva, had to deal with misinterpretation of his work. Although he had prescribed regulation of sense gratification for progressive life, people with a cheating, reactionary mentality were misusing his prescriptions. Regulated sex life beats animal life any day, but it doesn't mean that it's okay. Therefore he had to write further in order to clearly spell this out.

He produced his definitive work Vedanta-sutra in two versions. The first was the ultra-scholarly sutra edition for panditas, or Vedic intellectuals. This edition requires the study of the entire Vedic scriptural canon before reading it, because it does not repeat anything that has already been written elsewhere, but rather limits itself to resolving the controversies that rage amongst those scholars who have already read everything that came before. If you think making head or tail of my posts is hard, you ought to try the Vedanta-sutra some time.

The second edition was Vedanta-sutra for the Rest of Us, aka Srimad Bhagavatam <http://vedabase.net/sb/>. This edition is written in a story form that transmits the essential elements. Think Celestine Prophecy, to make an analogy.

Anyway, the Vedanta-sutra begins with the statement, "The conclusion is that spiritual advancement is the goal," and goes on from there. Of course, the whole argument that is concluded in the first line of the Vedanta-sutra is predicated on the whole Vedic canon and its practical application. The background of this statement is explained in Srimad Bhagavatam (1.5.15 <http://vedabase.net/sb/1/5/15>):

"The people in general are naturally inclined to enjoy, and you have encouraged them in that way in the name of religion. This is verily condemned and is quite unreasonable. Because they are guided under your instructions, they will accept such activities in the name of religion and will hardly care for prohibitions."

Here Vyasadeva's mentor, Narada Muni, explains to him the practical result of his proscribing sense gratification by prescribing regulation: the cheating mentality turns the restriction into an endorsement.

It's the same problem that plagues debate over the legalization of marijuana, for example. On the one hand, legalization advocates claim that at the moment there is no regulation. Legalization, they argue, will enable the government to regulate the sale and consumption of marijuana rather than simply letting it go on in a completely unregulated fashion. Opponents point out the phenomenon of the falling drinking age as a counter-point. The legalization of a substance generally leads to progressive acceptance and increasing social tolerance.

Narada Muni's remedial prescription for this situation was not a readjustment or a repeal of laws or arrangements relating to regulation of sense gratification, however. What he advised Vyasadeva was the following: "The Supreme Lord is unlimited. Only a very expert personality, retired from the activities of material happiness, deserves to understand this knowledge of spiritual values. Therefore those who are not so well situated, due to material attachment, should be shown the ways of transcendental realization, by Your Goodness, through descriptions of the transcendental activities of the Supreme Lord."

By hearing and speaking descriptions of the transcendental pastimes of the spiritually perfect, one gradually becomes purified and spiritually perfected, just as, in a mundane sense, by hearing stories of war or sports heroes one becomes inspired to follow in their footsteps.

Many of the people weighing in on the same-sex marriage debate are under various misconceptions of hetero marriage. Heterosex is condemned by learned transcendentalists as much as homosex is.

Narada Muni's conclusion, echoed in Vyasadeva's opening line in Vedanta-sutra is that persons who are married or single, heterosexual or homosexual, should carefully read Srimad Bhagavatam <http://vedabase.net/sb/> in order to understand the contents.

On a practical level, same-sex marriage is here, and it will be a widespread social reality moving forward into the future. Ultimately, while its social establishment is inevitable, it has to be done away with in the progressive spiritual life of the individual, just as heterosexual marriage does.

© dipika.org Mar. 31, 2005